


Cardassia Has No Sexual Harassment Policies

by Anonymouslazycat



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Butts, Crack, I Blame Tumblr, Julian is painfully dorky, M/M, Why Did I Write This?, but no butt crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-03-01 06:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2763806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymouslazycat/pseuds/Anonymouslazycat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by a Tumblr post. </p><p>What if Garak, instead of putting his hands on Julian's shoulders when they first met, put them...ahem...a little *lower*?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cardassia Has No Sexual Harassment Policies

**Author's Note:**

> The post in question is here: http://maketreknotwar.tumblr.com/post/95319296007/deepspaceniners-tvtropes-regarding-the
> 
> Also, turns out writing about butts is a good way to break writers block! Who knew?

_Now_ this _is a true frontier_ Julian thought to himself, leaning against the railing on the upper level of Quark’s and watching the crowd below. You couldn’t find a place like this back on Earth, that was for certain. Trashy, seedy, with just a hint of _danger._ Was that someone being arrested down there? He leaned over a little to get a better look. No, it was just the bar owner being told off for something. Cheating the Dabo players, from the sound of it. This sort of thing probably happened all the time.

 Oh, it was all so _exciting_.

 He was still watching the altercation when he heard someone coming up behind him. Who could that be? Did they need him for something? Was…

 Suddenly, he found himself face to face with…oh, my god. A Cardassian. _The_ Cardassian, the only one left on the station. The spy. Julian stared at him, wide-eyed, unsure of what to say. Or what to do. Or what was even going on, really.

 “It’s Doctor Bashir, isn’t it? Of course it is. May I…introduce myself?”

 “Er…yes, yes, of course.” Julian stammered out, after a moment to get his thoughts together. _He knows my name. Of course he knows my name. I’m the Chief Medical Officer, everyone knows my name. That’s all it is. Nothing else._

 “My name is Garak,” the man continued. “A Cardassian by birth, obviously. The only one of us left on this station, as a matter of fact.” He edged himself a little closer to where Julian was standing. “So I do appreciate making new friends _whenever_ I can. You _are_ new to this station, I believe?”

  _Why is he talking to me like an idiot? Does he think I’m an idiot?_

_…Do a lot of people think I’m an idiot?_

_God, I hope not._

Julian tried to act calm, suave even. “I am, yes.” He smiled. So far, so good. Then the long fronds of a nearby potted plant got in his face and he had to push them away awkwardly. So much for suave.

 It just wasn’t fair. Julian felt like he was wound tighter than a coiled spring, but Garak acted as if he hadn’t a care in the world. Even when Julian just about accused him of being a spy, he looked completely unruffled. On the outside, at least. Who knew? Maybe he was plotting something, secretly. Cardassian body language was still a bit hard for Julian to read. But it _was_ fascinating. He couldn’t decide if he was relieved or disappointed when Garak stopped leaning on the balcony next to him and stood up straight.

 “Good day to you, doctor.” Garak said, still looking at Julian with those perplexing, piercing eyes. “I’m so glad to have made such an… _interesting_ new friend today.”

 At the word _interesting_ , Julian felt the squeeze of a strong hand on his…backside. Had he just…? There was no one else near enough. Unbelievable. A spy had just grabbed his ass. A Cardassian had just grabbed his ass. A _Cardassian spy had just grabbed his ass_. Now that _definitely_ wouldn’t have happened back on Earth. He turned around, feeling as if he should say something- maybe something along the lines of _“did you seriously just grab my ass?”_ \- but Garak had already left. Julian was left standing there, feeling very confused and a little embarrassed. Or maybe it was the other was around.

 Either way, he knew one thing. When telling this story later, it would probably be best to leave that last part out.


End file.
